Solving the problem of the “mentally ill”

Recently the government has voiced plans to get the majority of those claiming Incapacity Benefit back to work. Many of these people claim to be suffering from so-called “mental illnesses” that can’t be readily explained or proven by many GPs, employee health advisers, shop stewards or canteen staff. It is largely assumed by all Right Thinking People™ that mental health problems are actually caused by godlessness, lack of fibre, excessive masturbation, communism and low-grade demonic possession. However as this also cannot be proven to an extent that convinces the liberal homosexuals and jews that run the world these days the rest of us have to put up with the excuses of this rather useless element of society.

Many of these people are on incapacity benefit due to the inability to deal with everyday life and encounters with normal people. Sometimes they can be react violently or spend time talking to themselves in an agitated fashion or be prone to crying in public making decent people feel uncomfortable and, at times, threatened. To many employers this sort of behaviour is neither productive nor cost effective and they would rather not have these people on their workforce. At the same time having them at home feeling sorry for themselves or wandering around in a sinister fashion while the rest of us work for a living isn’t something decent people are comfortable with either. It’s been proven in the past that people with mental health problems are more likely to be paedophiles or thieves than normal people so we would rather these “individuals” don’t have the run of the country while the rest of us are working. Especially where our children are concerned.

So how do you get people with mental health problems to get off their back sides and go back to work?

Simple. You cut their benefits off. Thankfully the government have decided to take the brave step of implementing this plan. The “mentally ill” will then either be forced to make more effort to sort themselves out in order to get a job and earn money and their place in society, or they’ll deteriorate and starve or be driven to suicide.

Either way taxpayers money will no longer be wasted on the terminally lazy and society will be able to move on without the burden of the “mentally ill”.

Hurrah. Another triumph for New Labour.

And now… this.

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