FILTH!

Sauce Sachet (transcribed because of my crap webcam. Someone please buy me a new scanner.)

RED SAUCE GUSHER SHOCK WEIRDO DIRT MESS HORROR!

A young person was SHOCKED, SICKENED, HORRIFIED and DISGUSTED today, when, upon opening a POT SIZZLER they discovered a small sachet of TOMATO SAUCE, lying there, on top of the dried noodles, like some PAINTED STRUMPET.

But despite initial alarm the yound person then emptied the sachet into the noodles and guzzled the whole mess down: snuffling and snorting like some filthy hog train.

TEAR AT CUT

Kless! I love their ad campaign. Who would have though the best way to push a product with absolutely no class whatsoever was to emphasise that? Genius. Their marketing people earn their, no doubt fairly sizable, wage. Though I daresay like <generalisation style=”gross”>ALL</generalisation> people who work in advertising they spend it snuffling and snorting on Pot Charlie™ which is a brand you won’t see in the supermarkets. Or at least not many of them.

Pot Sizzler isn’t that spanking gorgeous™ though. Very akin in flavour to the bacon flavour Super Noodles which are far from my preferred flavour of Super Noodle. As Pot Noodle goes I still prefer the Bombay Bad Boy for optimum slob-level culinary pleasure, or the good old fashioned Mild Curry flavour.

More Filth!

 More evidence of my pointless ebay addiction…

Sadly not the ultra rare original promo release they sent out to DJs and the like back in eightynine before the long careerless Ms Newton-John’s associates got wind of it and complained and forced the RevCo Boys to change the lyrics to some Chris Connelly penned shite but I have this rip of that one anyway that the glory of the internet blessed me with long ago. I just like me vinyls for ornamental reasons. Especially singles. CD singles always look like tack in their crappy little jewel cases that seem only at home in bargain bins. vinyls singles always have this decency about them. Even when they are indencent. Like this one.

But god bless them Revco Boys. Lets hope the new stuff keeps up the low standards they’ve laid down in the past. I’ve heard Al Jourgensens heroin induced premature aging and live mummification means he’s not up to the same levels of debauchery he used to manage back in the good ole days… pity.

Debauchery!

Yeah, maybe you’ve noticed what I’m listening to… and the album not out ’til next week. Yeah I caved, I’ve got it on pre-order and couldn’t wait a week. So what? I regret it now. I’m a bad person. I used to open presents on christmas eve and have been known to suffer premature ejaculation. I have no will-power. Go on, point at the pathetic freak… Go on! Enjoy yourself you petty-minded hypocritical bastard!

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