A man I know likes cords, He wears them every day, I cannot stand they way they feel, But could never bring myself to say. I wish he’d not make me rub them, As he does so with such glee, That I can only believe he knows my fears, And deliberately torments me. If such’s … Read more

The Arse Goblins

My daddy is a farter,and it stinks an awful lot.He says there are goblins up his arse,cooking old peppers in a pot. My daddy thought it funny.My mummy was dismayed.She made daddy see a doctor,But the goblins chased him away. So Mummy took Daddy to hospital,Where they sent police dogs up his arse,They took all … Read more

A Prayer for Peace

“Please forward this too all your friends on livejournal, myspace etc. The more people we can get to pray then the more likely it is to work. You must believe…” etc. Oh Lord…. He’s had his three score and ten, I think now it’s time to, take Ian Paisley, up into your loving arms. Stroke … Read more

Sleep now

I wish to slip away A little death Just for a while To have a rest Please watch my body While I’m dead Make sure no animal Steals my head

I have no taste

Sssh, my friend Please do not cry Uncrumple your theorem Wipe that tear from your eye For I hear your opinion I think that too but I’m a freak and so are you. And everybody else is right.

My Fat Arse

Ode To My Fat Arse By PRAEst76 (2003) My arse is huge and fat, like an disturbingly swolen cat, who’s abdominal infection, is beyond retraction, and that is the end of that… My arse is mammothly vast, like an ancient remembered past, full of great battles and wars, and people keeping scores, and the building … Read more

Are you there?

Mr Click-Clack followed me home last night. Follows me home every night. Home to my abode where I lock the door, to keep myself safe, from Mr Click-Clack. What does he want this Mr Click-Clack? Why is it that he follows me? Why does he always wait, outside my door? What is his raison detre? … Read more

Elevenses in the Hell House

Here I am. I’m lost again. Silly Me. What must you think? I never seem to find my way. ‘Silly you’ you say. ‘oh well, have some tea’. Try again tomorrow, yes ‘it happens’, you say. Then you see the blood, and broken bones and, ‘Silly you’ you said, ‘you always do such silly things’. … Read more