Vegetable Kingdom of a manic-depressive 2006-02-18 14:32:35

I haven't had time to write for some time. I've just moved into
my new home.

I met my old friend. We've known each other quite a long time,
but I we haven't met for a looooong time. He came here and we
had such a good time. Or at least I had. He played piano for me
for hours. I brushed his hair for the whole time and I totally
lost my sense of time. I still don't have lamps so we had to be
in a candle light. He played me a song from the movie Amelie
and I'm quite sure that was the exact moment I fell in love with
him. He let me sleep right next to him and we talked until 3 am.
or something. I haven't been that happy for ages. I have no
expectations or hopes considering that. He lost his girlfriend
a while ago. I hope he gets over it. Not because I want him for
myself (of course I wouldn't mind if he did suggest something like
that) but because he is such a nice man. He really is a person
who deserves to be happy.

Vegetable Kingdom of a manic-depressive 2006-01-27 16:44:46

Sad and alone.

I feel isolated. I started the packing yesterday.
Something really hit me today. I don't know what
it was, but it made me feel really bad and that's
how I've felt since. I've tried to meet my friends
but none of the is available. ex has his parents
there for a visit so I can't invite myself in.
At night I woke up and noticed that dog slept
beside me with her head on my tummy. I don't remember
her climbing up to the bed but there she was anyway.
That felt good and we slept well.

Vegetable Kingdom of a manic-depressive 2006-01-24 10:52:24

Living alone seems to be quite fun after all.
I don't have to worry about cleaning the mess that has been made by someone
else. There's no one present to tell me how lovely I am, but then again,
that didn't happen even when I had someone there who could have said so.
I can be happy about my cleaning and myself, because there's nobody to
ignore me and letting me know how unappreciateable I am.

We had plans with ex to have a movie night but he cancelled it last
night and for some smart-ass reason doesn't answer to my messages
concidering that. It's bit funny, because he did himself originally
ask me if the Tuesday was ok. Better for me of course. I have lots
of dull homework to do.

Vegetable Kingdom of a manic-depressive 2006-01-23 08:54:29

Ate too much in the morning. How two pieces of plain bread can make anyone so filled?
I skipped two lessons because I couldn't get up. I watched couple of minutes a movie
and now I should go to read my brilliant essay to the whole class. On the whole I
feel pretty bad. It might be a good idea to increase my medication.

Vegetable Kingdom of a manic-depressive 2006-01-20 15:07:34

I had two re-exams today. I'm pretty sure I failed math.
the other one went well. Nothing much has happened. Iv'e
been busy with school and so on. i should start cleaning
up places in case someone want to come to see this flat
before moving in. It's the same if there's mess but dirt
is another thing. I'm glad I now somehow control this place.
If I've cleaned in the morning places look the same when
I come back. There's nobody making up mess except from my
dog who has by the way been very well behaving for couple of days.