All posts filed under “satire

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What was your first car? Answer now and suffer the consequences!

 

What was your first car?

1.8k responses on the original post. 5.5k responses on the share?

Great.

Now I know what your first car was.

I also know, from your Facebook profile, what your full name is (thanks Facebook and your real name policy) where you live, (if you’ve entered it, which you probably have) who you work for and who your family members are. Some of you even have your phone number listed.

If you are female and married, I probably also know what you maiden name is if you’ve listed your mother as a family member (which you have). I also may know who your favourite bands are and where you were born. What school you went to, what university, what shops you like, what websites you go to.

Scared yet? No?

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Top 10 Google Cardboard Apps

I recently picked up a Google Cardboard VR headset, because curiosity. Google sell them on their website for $15, but I grabbed an unbranded copy for £2.50 on eBay. Technically, due to the simple nature of the device you can make one yourself but I can’t be bothered with that and if my paper-craft skills are anything to go by, the result would look like something Cthulhu crapped out after eating an Amazon delivery.

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A Nightmare in Elm Street 9: A Space Nightmare

imageFor countless generations (nobody has tried to count them but it’s theorised there could be as many as two) There has been a long held truth that goes like this,  any horror movie series that goes on long enough without a reboot will eventually end up in space. For years this has been disparaged by experts due to the one notable exception:  Freddy never went into space.

Well the horror movie history world has been turned on its head this week when a lost script was found lining a pensioners cat litter tray in Scunthorpe.

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Street Battles 2: The Can Opener

 

I’ve had this great idea for a film. Picture this; Gollum, from The Hobbit and that, buys up the remainder of the Keystone cops organisation from some auction or something, probably using money he made selling antiques. He then builds the Cops up again using young bullies and the more bitter class of nerds off the street, gives them access to all this ridiculous modern technology and basically turns them into a paramilitary group to serve his own selfish need to acquire shit that he can sit and fondle in the dark.

With me?

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Age of Ultron Trailer 2

“Guys, the first Age of Ultron teaser rocked the internet. For the second we need to build on that and blow peoples minds completely. Ideas!” “How about we break out the big guns? Ultron-centric. All those vehicles being crashed then…

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praest76@home:~$ sudo apt-get install something-better

Reading package lists… Done Building dependency tree Reading state information… Done The following extra packages will be installed: shitloads shitloads-dev shitloads-dbg libshitloads libshitloads-dev gholdem Suggested packages: tuxcart iesperanto kholdem kholdem-themes hurd hurd-doc-se The following NEW packages will be installed shitloads…

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Apple, Schmapple…

There is always the fear that this will become yet another one of those blogs that just links to other blogs. If so I’ll at least try to make it interesting by making comments or taking my own spin on…